1. When my little sister came home panting and crying about how some boys were messing with her, and me and Lee beat them up with lawn chairs. Like, we beat the shit out of these kids. It was so good. 2. How my mom surprised us with Jazzie. I just remember being waken up by my little sister’s hysterical screams, and (I didn’t have my glasses on) some little brown blob scampered into my room and starting biting my hands. I was scared to shit. Great first impression. 3. When I was little I spent the week with my grandma and she made me a PB&J with cheese on it. She said I just looked at the plate, up at her, and maintained eye contact with her until the sandwich was gone. 4. This is recent, but I didn’t meet my fat little nephew until my brother’s funeral, and I hadn’t seen any of my relatives on that side in like a decade. The first thing he did when he saw me was smile soooo big and put his hands out for me to pick him up. I picked him up and gave him little smoochies. My cousin whispered in his ear “This is your Aunt Jaynell, isn’t she pretty?” I cried like a fucking baby. A happy cry I guess.
1. I’ve had the same glasses for almost 3 years. I love them and they were in pristine condition until last night. I drink some beer, get nice and cozy in a corner, annnnnnnnnnnd of course.. someone punches me dead in the face, and they are crooked now. Okay that’s cool. Especially considering how far back in the fucking room I was. Luv when people come out of their mom’s basement once a year to see either Trash Talk or Trapped Under Ice and don’t know how to act. Go home, children, no one in Baltimore does that shit anymore. Take your shenanigans to Florida or something.
2. I’m staying in the city today, if you want to hang out find your way to me. Need to start hours towards my new bike. Walking down to the Walters to see a free exhibit once I get out of bed. Then taking a long nap on Fed Hill or something. I’m so tired of everyone.